ETA means estimated or expected time of arrival. It is a term usually used to inform you when a package is to arrive from the shipping company.
Aside from the port, delivery companies usually send an automated message to customers to assure them that their order is processing.
When a person asks for the ETA, there’s no harm in sending a funny reply.
In this blog post, I have listed 20 funny responses to ETA.
20 Funny Responses to ETA
“Time will tell”, “you will see me when you see me”, or “I’ll be there when I am ready”. “I haven’t got extensions for flying” are humorous replies to give when someone asks for ETA.
1. It’s the witching hour
The witching hour is a suitable funny response you can give to ETA to lighten the atmosphere.
Of course, no one will take you seriously. Well, that is unless they’re actual witches and you mess with the wrong person.
On a lighter note, however, this response is enough to assure them that their order is on its way to the owner.
This statement should be used when you’re sure that you’ll send a follow-up message with the correct details as soon as possible.
2. I’m sorry you’ve reached the wrong address
This response will cause the receiver to be on their nerves.
As much as it might tick a few nerves, the moment they catch the joke everything becomes better.
This type of response should be pursued by a polite apology and proper information.
If you decide to take the joke too far, you might be well on your way to court on Monday searching for a suitable attorney or looking for a way to get bail.
3. Let me check with the wife
This response will leave you dumbfounded for a moment.
Your first question is “what wife?” Why would they need their permission to tell you the estimated time of arrival?
As flustered as you might be, it is just a funny response to ETA. It will be unwise to develop knots in your brows.
For instance, if the delivery company noticed that you ordered something for the family, they will most likely be tempted to give this funny response.
4. Let me ask my pilot
The first thing to come to mind is if you’re at the airport.
Like, what pilot? Why would the pilot have such delicate information that other personnel is supposed to have?
It might even be worse if you’re at the port, you’d look around frantically searching for the hanger instead
You might even doubt your sanity. Let out a loud laugh, grin, and ask again to get the correct answer.
5. Let me ask Siri
This response would have been appropriate if you were asking your iOS about some other information.
But if you’re demanding the arrival time of your delivery, it is rather a shock.
It’s a sarcastic reply that you might consider true for a few seconds.
You will wonder if you’re at an iOS store or if you’re speaking into your phone’s speaker.
6. Sorry, it’s way past my bedtime
Getting this response will wipe the smirk off your face, especially during the day.
Immediately, you might wonder if you’re in another time zone or if the hangover from the previous night’s activities hit too hard.
Also, you will wonder whether the delivery company is a time traveler or if they dabble in the dark arts here and there.
This type of response will surely leave you teary-eyed with laughter if you need to loosen up.
7. Ah, you’ve caught me again
Now, this is a weird response to ETA.
What are you catching them doing?
How does that concern you? Do you two know each other?
It would even be weirder if you have never met before.
Normally, you can respond with “ah, you’ve caught me again” when you’re playing hide and seek with your kids in the house.
Getting a response like this when you ask for the ETA could also make you reminisce about the good old days of childhood.
Although it could count as an appropriate response if you have been there before and they promised to get back to you without fulfilling their promise.
8. Sorry, I’m the babysitter
I’m the babysitter is a response a preteen girl would give when older folks came to check whose home.
More so if there is loud music playing and all the lights are on.
Undoubtedly, it is a funny response to give to ETA.
To make this response outrageous, you can say this in a singsong voice trying to imitate a young girl.
The customer will be concerned if they stopped by the nannies to pick up their kids rather than a parcel.
9. I’m not supposed to be on duty
If someone says I’m not supposed to be on duty, it could be understandable.
Although it’s funny because if you aren’t on duty then why are you the one responding to the customer?
To do a fast one before the shift is over, you might stand a chance to do two things. One is to draw a smile from the customer or get them upset.
This response is funny when you ask about the ETA. Remember that customers are always right.
10. Are you the crazy one who ordered the infected hyena?
I know the orders we place might range from a lot of weird things from lubricants to nail polishes.
These things depend on the individual and their needs at a particular time and season.
However, ordering an infected hyena is downright outrageous.
So this response is a funny response to ETA. They can simply answer the question with your package details and information.
Well, if you ordered a hyena, it might not be so funny when someone calls your very expensive pet infected.
Well, if it gets infected along the line, you can always call the vet doctor.
11. You have no business with this company
It could come more than a shock than a funny statement.
However, for people whose first response to situations is laughter, it could be funny.
It doesn’t mean that they inhaled a good amount of laughing gas, it only means that they choose the best way to respond to situations.
Ultimately, it is impossible not to have a business with a delivery company when you’re asking for the ETA.
In the first place, you would not have their information like email address and company name amongst others if you have no business with them.
Also, if you choose this shipping method, it means you trust them to an extent enough to make their business your own business.
12. Let me check in with the kids first
Checking with the kids? Really?
This is one funny response to ETA. What does being with kids have to do with the timing of arrival?
As far as business is concerned, the organization is run by adults only.
Also, there is an age limit for applicants that are eligible for the job.
This way, you’ll be sure that there are no kids close by.
Also, I’m sure it’s not a family business that parents consult children before they pass information or make decisions.
13. Peter pan sprinkles pixie dust on the papers again
Blaming Peter Pan for your misfortune is one fun way to escape from doing your job.
Simply send the estimated time of arrival. Anyone familiar with the story of Peter Pan would relate to this.
Then, the response could be funny to them. Easing the tension in the atmosphere helps to kill stress hormones and allows work to continue with no hindrances.
14. I can’t see without my glasses
Of course, a blind man can’t see scribbled information on paper before they can tell you.
Ultimately, I can tell. Now, for someone that needs to know the estimated time of arrival, they just need information.
Do not bother burdening them with your plight of near blindness.
When you divulge personal information to them, it is shrugged aside and disregarded.
In a real sense, nothing connects the ETA with your glasses.
15. I don’t talk to strangers, please
If you don’t talk to strangers, I wonder if you need that job.
This response is undoubtedly the funniest response to ETA.
It is another way of saying you do not need the money or care about your job.
As a business, meeting strangers is a major part of growth and expansion.
Although it’s a great thing to keep customers and loyal patrons.
However, it would mean a positive thing if strangers are welcomed and treated warmly even.
This also buttresses that a smile is very warm and comforting, especially on a bad day.
16. Don’t you dare raise your voice at me
Everything about this response is funny.
Indeed, it is absurd to ask for the ETA and be accused of raising your voice.
For people with deep voices, it could mean a little more because they’re used to people talking about their voices.
However, if you sound so chirpy and airy, you probably are in a good place to laugh your guts out.
It is someone who has an ear infection or they haven’t cleaned out ear wax in a long time.
17. Why don’t you call 911
The police have their jurisdiction as everyone else. It is hilarious if you go to the seaport and ask for the ETA and they ask you to call 911.
You might as well think the world is about to end or you’re finally becoming schizophrenic as your mother feared.
Trust me, none of that information feels good to know or to be confirmed as true.
The police will remain in their offices as naval officers will attend to you with your shipping.
18. I’m not Alexa
Since Alexa is a perfect companion, it would be ideal if you thought the answers will always be available.
However, having someone that is supposed to be at your service tell you they’re not Alexa is funny.
Alexa or not, all you care about is the ETA.
It would be preferable for them to stop the tormentor’s process of time wasting especially when you’re in a hurry.
Even though a little comment here and there might put you at ease, I hope it is necessary.
19. You don’t own me
This response to ETA might appear racist or even sexist. It immediately implies that you are verbally abusing the delivery attendant.
Owning someone is an old practice of buying slaves and selling them to the highest bidder according to strength, beauty, or other special requirements.
However, saying this in response to ETA will blow the roof off the conversation.
As much as a good number of people will find it offensive, some will laugh it off. Well, we hope the sun shines luck on you on that special day.
20. It’s raining, and I have got to play
Playing in the rain is common with kids or people who have missed rainfall for a long time.
In addition, couples in the movies are the only ones that get caught in the rain and share a rather passionate moment.
While you’re at work, it’s not time for pleasure or personal gratification.
So, saying that it’s raining and you have to play is outrageous. It would be best if you’d done your job before heading out.
That is if it’s not just a sarcastic statement but a sincere remark.
Parting Words
In conclusion, there are a plethora of other fun things you can respond to ETA.
However, you can indulge in these 20 Funny Responses to ETA.
The list is endless as you can choose others that favor a particular situation better.
Remember that the more hilarious your response, the more reaction you get and the healthier your living.
I hope you find this helpful.