10 Polite Ways to Tell Your Upstairs Neighbors to Stop Stomping

I’m sure you know living in an apartment building can be tricky. You’ve got to deal with all sorts of people and their weird habits – and sometimes, those habits can be downright annoying.

Take my upstairs neighbor, for example. She’s a great person, but she has this one annoying habit: she likes to stomp around her apartment.

I’m not exaggerating when I say it sounds like she’s walking on concrete. It’s driving me crazy!

If you’re dealing with a noisy upstairs neighbor too, don’t worry. In this article, I’ll share 10 tips for telling your upstairs neighbors to stop stomping and taking back control of your living space.

10 Ways You Can Get Your Upstairs Neighbors to Stop Stomping

Are your upstairs neighbors making a racket that is keeping you up at night? Is their incessant stomping on the floor disrupting your daily life?

If so, here are 10 ways to tell them to stop stomping to create a peaceful environment for everyone.

  1. Hold a direct discussion
  2. Make a Request to Only Stomp During Certain Hours
  3. Put a Noise Complaint in Writing
  4. Make a Follow-up Call or Email
  5. Show the Neighbor What It Sounds Like From Below
  6. Send a Polite Note
  7. Request a Middle Ground Arrangement
  8. Talk to Your Landlord
  9. Contact a Lawyer for Help With Legal Steps

Hold a direct discussion

Ways to Tell Your Upstairs Neighbors to Stop Stomping

I believe that one of the most effective ways to resolve the stomping issue with your upstairs neighbor is to simply hold a direct discussion with them.

In my experience, I have had to address a noise issue with my upstairs neighbor on multiple occasions. In these difficult conversations, I maintained politeness and respect.

I tried to explain why the noise was disruptive and asked them to lower the volume. Though this kind of conversation can be uncomfortable, it was nonetheless the best way for me to make sure that my needs were being addressed.

Admittedly, having a direct conversation can often be difficult. Providing a clear and specific example of the noise they are creating will make the conversation much more productive.

I also recommend being honest with your neighbor when you explain how their actions are affecting you. Also, be open to their situation and try to cooperate wherever possible.

Assure them that you are not trying to be overly critical, but simply trying to solve a mutual problem.

Ask Politely for Them to Stop

I know it can be frustrating when your upstairs neighbor is stomping around like a herd of elephants. I’ve been in such a situation like this before and I often find it helpful to approach the issue with politeness and honesty.

In some cases, your upstairs neighbors may not even be aware that their stomping is bothering you, so it’s important to express your frustration respectfully.

First, it’s best to introduce yourself and your family to your upstairs neighbors. This way, it may come across as a concerned neighbor rather than a hostile one.

Additionally, when explaining the problem, it’s best to own your feelings by saying ‘I’  instead of ‘we’  or ‘they’.

Try expressing something like, ‘I’m having trouble sleeping at night due to the noise,’  instead of, ‘My family can’t handle the noise.’ Avoiding blame by using the word ‘you’  can help ease any tension.

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The key is, to be honest about your concerns and ask for their help to address the problem in a mutually beneficial way.

Make a Request to Only Stomp During Certain Hours

If you’ve already tried coming to an understanding or compromise with your upstairs neighbors and they’re still not hearing your requests, it might be a good idea to make a more formal request.

Try talking to your neighbors and explain that you find the stomping disruptive and request that they only stomp during certain hours.

This might include hours when you’re not normally home like 8 am – 8 pm or weekdays when you’re out of the house.

This could be a difficult task to ask of them, so it’s important to be courteous, patient, and understanding.

Start by expressing your gratitude for your neighbors and how you hope this conversation can be constructive.

Explain how the stomping is negatively impacting your day and how it affects your work or sleep.

Make it clear that it’s bothersome and that you’d appreciate it if they’d try to reduce the noise during certain hours.

Put a Noise Complaint in Writing

Writing a formal letter of complaint can be one of the most effective ways to put your neighbor on notice.

Writing down your grievances in a polite but firm letter can help you be heard by your neighbor and their landlords. It also creates a legal document if the case ever winds up in court.

When it comes to writing the letter, make sure to thoroughly explain why you’re writing, and provide clear examples of the noise violations you’re experiencing.

Be sure to keep it civil; don’t make any personal attacks or threats! It may help to include what actions they should take to fix the problem, such as using soundproofing insulation or flooring pads under furniture.

Stick to the facts and avoid getting overly emotional or aggressive.

Let them know that if there is no resolution, you will have no choice but to pursue legal action. This may be what it takes for them to take things seriously and finally get them to stop all that stomping!

Make a Follow-up Call or Email

Ways to Tell Your Upstairs Neighbors to Stop Stomping

If you’ve tried knocking on your upstairs neighbor’s door but they’re not home or not responding, or if they didn’t seem to take your request seriously, it may be time to Make a Follow-up Call or Email.

This can be a great way to get the message across more seriously and directly.

Start by being polite and explaining what’s been happening and why it bothers you. Let them know that their stomping is keeping you up all night, and affects your concentration during the day.

It might also be helpful to suggest some solutions – this could be anything from soundproofing the apartment to discussing alternate schedules for when it’s ok for them to move around normally and when they can expect quiet from you.

Sometimes we all need a friendly reminder, so don’t hesitate to reach out over email or phone if that’s what it takes for your upstairs neighbor to understand how important this issue is for you.

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Show the Neighbor What It Sounds Like From Below

When I was dealing with a particularly bad stomping upstairs, I decided to show my neighbor what the noise sounded like from below.

This was particularly effective since the neighbor wasn’t aware of the sound level she was creating.

So, how did I do it? I set up my phone on a table in my living room and recorded the sound of her stomping upstairs.

Then, I went up to her apartment and played the sound for her so that she could hear what it sounded like from downstairs. She was shocked and apologized immediately – and after that, the stomping stopped for good!

It may be a bit awkward doing this experiment but if your neighbor isn’t aware of just how loud her stomping is, this could be an effective way to show them what it sounds like down below.

Send a Polite Note

I think the key here is to approach this conversation in the nicest, most polite way possible. No one likes a confrontation so it’s best to be friendly, kind, and understanding.

One way to do this is to write your upstairs neighbor a note expressing your concern about the noise coming from their unit.

t doesn’t have to be long or complicated, just enough to get the point across.

Here’s an example of a polite note to send to your neighbor to stop them from stomping:

Dear Neighbor,

I hope this note finds you well! I’m your downstairs neighbor and I wanted to let you know that I can hear a lot of noise coming from the floor.

I can hear walking, TV, and other loud noises late into the night/early morning hours and it’s been pretty disruptive to my sleep schedule lately.

Could you kindly keep the noise level down so that everyone in our building can have peace? Thanks for understanding!


Your Downstairs Neighbor

Request a Middle Ground Arrangement

This is when both parties find a mutually agreeable solution that works for both of them. Here are some examples of how this could work:

If your neighbors are making a lot of noise throughout the day, try asking them if they could be considerate of your work hours and study hours and try to be quieter within these blocks of time.

If buying noise-canceling headphones isn’t an option for you, a compromise could be to ask them to use softer shoes, to turn down their music, or to carpet their floor to muffle the sound.

Another option is to propose a cooperative schedule. Agreeing to just one hour of music or television time per day could be a great compromise. That way both of you can have time to relax peacefully.

Finally, if the problem persists, you could suggest talking to the landlord about the issue to get something done about the noise.

The problem could be caused by an underlying structural problem, and in this case, the landlord would be the one responsible for fixing it.

No matter what you decide, make sure it works for both of you. Taking the time to figure out a middle-ground arrangement is the best way to come to a peaceful resolution.

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Talk to Your Landlord

Ways to Tell Your Upstairs Neighbors to Stop Stomping

If you’ve already tried the above solutions and haven’t seen any results, it might be time to escalate the situation and get your landlord involved.

After all, this isn’t just an annoyance for you, but also a potential legal issue – it’s your landlord’s job to ensure that tenants are sharing the building peacefully.

Schedule a meeting with your landlord and explain what you’ve tried so far, how the problem persists, and how it’s affecting your lifestyle.

Your landlord should be able to confront your upstairs neighbor and make sure they get the hint.

Sometimes a tenant ‘warning’ with clear rules of acceptable behavior can go a long way.

For example, if noise levels cross a certain level or if stomping is heard past 10 PM, then this could result in an official warning or even eviction.

Putting things in writing can leave no doubt as to each party’s expectations and make sure everyone is on the same page.

Contact a Lawyer for Help With Legal Steps

If your dealings with your upstairs neighbors have failed miserably and the stomping noise continues to disrupt your quality of life, it may be time to explore your legal options.

Contacting a lawyer is the most serious step you can take, so you must understand what you’re getting into.

I suggest you look for a lawyer who specializes in tenant-related issues. Talk to the lawyer about your case and gather as much information as possible.

Allow the lawyer to help you determine the best course of action. Depending on the laws in your state, there are a few legal steps you can take.

For instance, many states allow for an order of abatement or a preliminary injunction, which stops the landlord from distributing a nuisance to the tenant or other people.

Another option is to raise an eviction action to have the offending tenant removed and forced to pay damages. The landlord might also be liable, in some cases.

Your legal options may vary depending on the state you live in, so it’s important to speak with a lawyer who is well-versed in your local laws.

This can help ensure that you take the right steps to address your problem with the upstairs neighbors.

Don’t forget to explain the issue and any attempts you’ve already taken to solve it with the neighbors. Your lawyer can then advise you of the best course of action.

At the end of the day, dealing with your upstairs neighbors should be handled respectfully and civilly.


In conclusion, it can be difficult to tell your upstairs neighbors to stop stomping.

However, if you take a few simple steps such as communicating politely, getting proof of the noise disturbance, and looking into local ordinances or landlord policies, it can make the process easier.

By following these steps, you can effectively deal with stomping noises coming from upstairs and ensure that everyone in the building is living peacefully.

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