To be honest, the cliché phrase mentioned in the topic is too cliché to be simply called cliché.
We probably all know what it means since we may have used it once or twice in our lives, and may use it a billion times more before we fall into eternal sleep. Instead of this phrase, one can say ‘I don’t mean to be rude’.
This article will help you with 10 other expressions that pass the same message as ‘No hard feelings’. This may seem useless but it is important to know if you think the phrase will be taken the wrong way.
In the list below, you will find milder expressions and also more direct expressions. Therefore, you get to choose how your message is received.
10 Other Ways To Say “No Hard Feelings”
- No resentment
- I don’t mean to be rude
- Listen
- I’m not angry
- I mean no disrespect
- Don’t get mad
- I hold no grudge
- I’m not trying to argue
- Don’t mind me
- This may upset you.
No resentment
First, saying ‘No hard feelings’ is more like telling a person not to think you are angry while you truly are. However, it doesn’t have to mean that.
You can always say it if you think your comment or what you are about to say may sound angry or hateful. You don’t want to get on the bad books of people.
Saying ‘No resentment’ is simply telling your listener that you are not trying to show any form of hatred, even though you think your later or previously stated comment will sound like you resent him or her.
Like ‘No hard feelings’, this may not stop the person from thinking you are only trying to show resentment with your statement when you can’t hide it. It is often said before making the comment being referred to. ‘But’ is usually introduced as a conjunction.
- “No resentment but I think you are making a really bad decision here, brother”
I don’t mean to be rude
This is a comment that often deserves an ha-ha reaction and I have a feeling everyone knows why. It is quite similar to the option stated earlier in terms of sarcasm, although not always.
About 90% of the time a person uses this statement, he or she is often trying to do the opposite of what he or she has said. In fact, when a person says this to you, expect him or her to say something extremely rude to you.
Saying ‘I don’t mean to be rude’ often means you are about to point out a fact that may sound rude or may not be taken lightly by your listener. It may also just be you expressing how you feel in a rude manner while justifying it.
After saying you don’t mean to be rude, you will add the ‘but’ conjunction and say the definitely-rude statement you have in mind. It is not often different when a person says ‘No hard feelings’. The listener is expected to think of the next statement as rude or hateful.
- “I feel awful for saying this, and i don’t mean to be rude, but your painting looks awful, It needs to be changed totally.”
The statement above points out a fact in a rude manner. It is understood that the speaker does not intend disrespect but the message that must be passed is not a light one and will be considered rude by whomever he or she is referring to.
- “I don’t mean to be rude but I find your behavior quite selfish.”
The statement above shows the speaker’s feeling toward the listener’s behavior. It is not a fact that everyone may agree with but an action has evoked the feelings in the speaker and he or she is expressing it rudely.
Listen!
This is a short but effective one. Unlike ‘No hard feelings’, this one is extremely straightforward and has a major meaning that is never mistaken. When a person says ‘No hard feelings’, you should understand that he or she wants to pass a message.
Asides from the fact that it may be found disrespectful or resentful by the listener, it is also a message that is considered important. Instead of saying ‘No hard feelings’ and saying something that may make your listener think otherwise, one can choose to not say it at all.
However, it is mostly used when the fact must be pointed out. While ‘No hard feelings’ is milder and slightly respectful, ‘Listen’ is direct and is often rude.
By saying Listen, you are telling your listener that he or she has to hear a hard truth that you are about to say. It is often a disrespectful statement with no show of remorse for saying it.
After saying ‘Listen’, you don’t need the ‘but’ conjunction. You can just go ahead and say what you have to say.
- “Listen, sir. I don’t think that painting of yours is worthy to be shown off. It really is terrible and should not even be considered a work of art.”
The statement above points out a fact in a disrespectful manner and shows no remorse. You can proceed to add ‘No offense’ at the end of your statement, though it won’t really help.
- “Listen. I find your behavior extremely selfish.”
The statement above bluntly mentions how the speaker feels toward the listener. You can equally mention ‘No offense’ in this case.
I’m not angry
When a person says he or she isn’t angry, it may or may not be true. However, it is usually clear from his or her facial expression.
A person can say this when the statement that he or she is about to make next will scold the listener or if the comment will address something worthy of his or her anger.
Unlike the other options mentioned on this list, this will sound less disrespectful or may not even sound disrespectful in any way. It may simply say how the speaker feels about something.
Saying I’m not angry often talks about a situation applying to both the speaker and the listener while focusing on the speaker’s feelings and the listener’s provocation. Also, the rudeness of the next statement by the speaker is often justified.
This may just be the best option since the listener may just feel remorse for what has been done to you. However, if what you are referring to had nothing to do with your anger or the Listener’s influence on your feelings, this response would be unsuitable.
- “ not angry but I don’t find that mocking smile of yours really stupid.”
The statement above includes a rude comment on the listener. However, it can be deducted that the speaker is still angry and the listener should understand that he or she has provoked the speaker in a way.
I mean no disrespect
This can be used in present or past tense, that is it may come before the seemingly-disrespectful statement you are referring to or after. Almost all of the other options are the same but they are most often used before the statement while this one may appear after the statement more often than others.
When a person makes this statement, it is often because he or she knows what will be said or has been said will seem disrespectful to the person listening.
Saying I mean no disrespect is often used to just calm the listener down while the speaker truly intends to say something disrespectful.
However, it may also be an outburst that sounds disrespectful to the speaker only after he or she has made the statement. In that case, ‘I MEANT no disrespect’ will be a way to apologize.
This also often deals with the speaker’s feelings and reactions to what the listener has done. It often passes the message that the listener has done something wrong; wrong enough to be disrespected for.
- “I mean no disrespect but that is not a very wise thing to say, considering the parties involved in this discussion.”
Above, the speaker warns of his disrespectful statement. It tells the listener that what he or she has done something that warrants disrespect. It will still be found disrespectful.
- Speaker: “That was not very wise, sir.”
- Listener: “What does that mean?”
- Speaker: “I meant no disrespect.”
Here, the speaker says the disrespectful statement first, then says ‘I meant no disrespect’ as a form of apology.
Don’t get mad
This seems like a potential antonym for ‘I am not angry’ mentioned above but it is not entirely true. At least, not in the situation we are going to talk about. Both expressions will function similarly in this situation but they can’t both work in the same contexts.
As mentioned earlier, ‘I am not angry’ tends to focus on the speaker’s feelings coupled with the Listener’s provocation. On the other hand, ‘Don’t get mad’ is much closer to ‘No hard feelings’ in meaning. However, there is still a slight difference.
While ‘No hard feelings’ explicitly says you hold no resentment, ‘Don’t get mad’ explicitly says the person may be upset or angry about what you have said or are about to say.
Saying ‘Don’t get mad’ implies that your next or previous statement may provoke your listener. However, it also implies that you have a reason for making your comment. In addition, if may also be coupled with an apology later on.
Despite its tiny difference from ‘No hard feelings’, it can be used interchangeably when your statement may get someone angry.
- “Don’t get mad. Your painting really makes no sense to me”
In the statement above, the speaker’s comment would definitely get the listener pissed. Rather than as an appeasement, the preceding phrase functions as a warning.
Hold no grudge
Hard Feelings are synonymous with ‘Grudge’ which make the two phrases seem exactly the same. Truly, this statement can function in several contexts which ‘No hard feelings’ can come in but it won’t fit in all. When a person says ‘No hard feelings’, it could refer to anger, hatred, and jealousy.
You can say ‘No hard feelings’ when your comment sounds wicked. However, ‘Grudge’ is ‘Grudge’ and will therefore not function in passing any other message asides from anger and hatred.
By saying you hold no grudge, you are telling your listener that your previous or next comment is not due to anger or hatred. It can also be said after your listener has done something capable of getting you offended.
It is very similar to ‘I’m not angry’ and will most likely focus on the relationship between the speaker and the listener. However, that is not necessary.
- “I hold no grudge but your reaction toward the performance made no sense”
The statement above focuses on how the speaker feels towards the Listener’s provocation.
- “I hold no grudge but your painting isn’t attractive enough to be shortlisted.”
This statement tells the listener that the speaker is not influenced by negative emotions.
I’m not trying to argue.
This views the discussion in a new light. Virtually all of the options mentioned earlier focus on giving simple reviews. However, this one can fit perfectly within an argument.
A person can say ‘No hard feelings’ when trying to contradict what the listener has said. Saying this will not prevent an argument, however. Rather, it works as a prefix to lay down your point.
Saying ‘I’m not trying to argue’ implies that your comment can lead to an argument but you felt the need to say it without offending the listener.
This may be a more polite way to say ‘Listen’, though they can’t be used interchangeably in all contexts.
- “I’m not trying to argue but you are wrong about the civil war. I witnessed it.”
This statement contradicts what the listener has already said. However, it starts with a polite clause that tells the listener not to be offended.
Don’t mind me
This is another extremely polite way of saying what you have to say while mentioning that the listener can ignore you if he or she wants. This works as a worthy replacement if ‘No hard feelings’ has been used to express one’s opinion which may not be taken lightly by the listener.
By saying ‘Don’t mind me’, you are telling your listener not to be bothered by what you have said. It is often said after you have left your opinion about something that has to do with the listener.
- “I don’t think it’s wise to register with this group. Don’t mind me.”
The statement above mentions how the speaker feels about what the listener is about to do. The added phrase suggests that the speaker’s opinion may be only based on premonitions.
This may upset you
This is a direct way to drop your directly disrespectful opinion with no remorse. When you say this, you are only getting the person prepared for the rude comment you are about to say.
By saying ‘This may upset you’, you are acknowledging that you know how provoking your comment will sound. However, there is an implicit suggestion that you feel the need to say it and you won’t regret saying it.
- “This may upset you. No one wants you here.”
The statement above drops a message that the listener will not be pleased with. The preceding clause prepares the listener, though inadequately.